The recent deployment of federal law enforcement officers to protect federal property in cities that are suffering through what some have called an increase in violent and heinous crimes perpetrated by  urban terrorists could be the beginning of establishing a 21st Century style Roman imperial Praetorian Guard.  A guard that was responsible only to the emperor .

It would be interesting to ask how many Americans even knew that the Department of Homeland Security, Border Patrol and the US Marshals had camo-decked deployable urban shock troops.  It never entered my mind. Besides having Secret Service protection, and being in control of the military, the president now has at his disposal what looks like his own federal militia; or a Praetorian Guard to go out and do his political dirty work.

 

Today, some  people’s association with Praetorian Guards  may come from Star Wars. These are the crimson-clad warriors in the recent Star Wars movie: The Last Jedi.  They were Supreme Leader Snoke’s highly trained bodyguards.  How he ended up with eight elite Praetorian Guards I don’t know. All I know is it was “A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away….” For all their hype as being bad asses, one disgruntled dark-sided Jedi and a truth-seeking Jedi trainee managed to kill all eight guards with a pair of lightsabers.

I have seen all the Star Wars movies. I have not figured out the timeline on any of them past the one where a group of teenagers blew up the first Death Star. I sort of get the concept  of the Force but Jar Jar Binks, clone wars, trade federations, and the First Order just puzzle me.

In any case, from watching the previous Star Wars movies it would seem to me that the Supreme Leader should have had a lot more of these guards looking after his imperial property. Considering that the Empire already lost several Dark Lords of the Sith and two Death Stars to intergalactic, outside agitators.

But losing two Death Stars, that had to be a huge budget hit to the Empire.  That would be like the US suffering the loss of two Space Shuttles. But unlike the US, they had numerous galaxies to fund their space efforts. After the Shuttles were grounded, we had to “Uber” our way to get a “Lyft” into space on a Russian Soyuz. Talk about taking a back seat after winning the space race.

 

But back on Earth, we first bounce into Praetorian Guards in Rome, before it was a Republic. These fasce-carrying “lictors” actually go back to the first Roman king, Romulus, who had 12 lictors. Some say it was 12 because in an omen he saw 12 birds flying off.  Before he was king, Romulus and his brother, Remus, disagreed on which of the seven hills to build their city. Legend has it that Romulus either killed his twin brother or had one of his supporters do the job. Remus’ death settled which hill the future city of Rome would be built on; and maybe this gave us the term: is this the hill we want to die on.  In any case, the control of the known world at that time was centered on those seven hills. And I know, in today’s revised look at history, the term “known world” is probably the wrong term to use.

However, we must agree that Romans were a straightforward group. For instance, most of the roads they built were straight with few curves or bends. For them it was never straight but always forward. It was from point A to point B as quickly as possible. And when they got there they could be a ruthless group to cut a trade deal with. Their labor relations could be suspect, too. They had no problem removing indigenous defeated people to Rome. After all, the Colosseum and those Aqueducts were not going to build themselves. Roman emperors liked to be known for the things they built.

And Roman intrigue is something to write about. They had it all at one time or another: mob rule, assassinations, and only Romans could turn religious dissidents into great sporting events.  I can just hear Shakespeare saying to his editor when penning Julius Caesar:  “This stuff writes itself.”  After Caesar was killed on the Senate floor the idea of having a handful of veteran, loyal Legionaries hanging around watching your back seemed like a good idea.  The need to sleep with one eye open became a political necessity. So, when one magistrate has a dozen guards they all wanted a fasces-carrying entourage. I guess the tradition stuck; and before long Roman legates had bodyguards.

As generals became more powerful they also saw the need for bodyguards. Generals used bodyguards to guard them in camp.  No midnight sneak attacks from a daytime “smiling face.” Camp life was one thing but it was during battle that the general also needed protection from capture and maybe a rogue assassin taking advantage of the fog of war.  Soon the Praetorian Guards took on military attitude and went from a handful to the size of a regular Roman military unit.

Before long there were several legions of these guards protecting emperors. They were also used for keeping the city of Rome and its environs peaceful.  No graffiti on the Circus Maximus. It did not take long before they became institutionalized as part of the government. These hand-picked veterans of the Roman legions soon became not only a military force to reckon with but a political one, too.  In some ways they become the eyes and the ears–and the enforcers of imperial rule of law. But whose law.

During the final years of Caligula’s rule both the Praetorian Guards and the Roman Senate were questioning how to get rid of the highly “toxic” bully  with perverted and vindictive tendencies.  An emperor who wished to be deified; and had no problem mocking and belittling fellow Romans. While the Senate pondered the situation the Praetorian Guard acted. The Senate, without Legions of their own, lacked the muscle needed to topple an emperor.

One Roman Caligula  should not have mocked was Cassius Chaerea. According to Roman history Cassius Chaerea had a high squeaky voice. Cassius was also a Praetorian Guard Tribune who didn’t like being publicly ridiculed.  It was Cassius and another guard who met Caligula one night in an underground passage. The pair assassinated him while other guards  killed Caligula’s family. The Praetorians then installed  Caligula’s uncle Claudius as Emperor. The Roman Senate had no choice but to accept the Praetorians’ actions.

 

Caligula was not the last emperor to run afoul of  the Praetorian Guards. In good time  emperors made sure they were compensated for their loyalty: Better pay and accommodations could find the Praetorians shifting their allegiance. The political intrigues could run deep and bloody as loyalties shifted.  It was not until 300 AD that Constantine, during a period of political instability in Rome, came west and defeated the Praetorians’ choice of emperor. The Praetorians were then disbanded.

Jumping to today, our laws restrict the use of military troops to enforce civil laws. The Posse Comitatus Act allows the President to call out troops or federalize the National Guard when  “unlawful obstructions, combinations, or assemblages, or rebellion against the authority of the United States, make it impracticable to enforce the laws of the United States.” And he can use these forces “as he considers necessary to enforce those laws or to suppress the rebellion.”

It would be hard to compare a group of people, even if they were anarchists, spray painting graffiti on a federal building  as an assembly that makes it “impractical to enforce the laws” as a reason to call out the 82nd Airborne. But hey, the next best thing: Checkout Homeland Security, the department designed to keep us safe from airplane flying terrorists. Let’s put the Border Patrol and the US Marshals in unmarked vans…

As Shakespeare probably would say:  You can’t make this shit up.  It writes itself. And why not? Because its been done before.